Look, it’s that time of year again—spring portal chaos. Phones blowing up, bags being tossed like Mardi Gras beads, and coaches sweating through their polos. And LSU? They playin’ chess, not checkers. HC Brian Kelly might’ve done his heavy lifting in January, but now he’s sitting on the porch with one eye on his roster and the other on the portal window. And it isn’t all sunshine in Baton Rouge. There’s a deadline, there’s a threat, and there’s a whole lot of questions about what LSU’s really cooking behind closed doors.

Here’s the kicker: this isn’t just about who they might add. It’s about who they might lose. And when Shea Dixon dialed Matt Moscona’s After Further Review podcast, he didn’t just spill the tea—he dumped the whole damn kettle on Brian Kelly’s lap. “They’ll always take D-line guys,” Dixon said. “Well, we knew that D-line, D-tackle—look, they’ll always take them. But it’s such a premium position that, of course, you’re always on the lookout for it. Let’s do it by signing high school guys, retaining guys on the roster, you know, keeping the Dom McKinleys and everybody.” And then if you have to add any D-line transfers, you can. Matt, I wonder—and this is the balancing act.” 

Translation? LSU might not be that desperate. Not yet. But the clock is ticking, and if too many dominoes fall, they gonna have to pivot fast. Defensive tackle is the one spot where LSU still looks a little light. If a couple more names hit the portal, is this a safe game? Nope. It’ll be over. Brian Kelly’s going to be back out there, swinging like it’s January all over again.

See, let’s not pretend like LSU hasn’t been busy. The Tigers went full Thanos mode in the winter window. They upgraded damn near every position. Portal kings. Top 3 class. But now? The spring window’s lookin’ quiet—and maybe too quiet. When you build a natty-level squad, quiet ain’t always good. You want depth. You want insurance. And right now, defensive line ain’t giving ‘locked in’ vibes.

Shea doubled down: “Kind of the last thing you’re wanting to do is say, ‘Hey look, let’s take this other guy, bring him in, who may or may not even be as good as those guys,’ and say, ‘All right, you’re added.’ And then those guys say, ‘Oh well, look, if you’re continuing to add guys, I’m probably going to play less, so I’m out now.’ So when Brian Kelly said they really like their roster right now, I think that’s what—kind of the big point he’s making—is, we’ll choose and kind of work with what we’ve got, um, you know, in this final stretch of the portal window.” 

Last year, LSU’s D-line was like that one cousin who shows up late to the cookout and still expects the first plate. Had potential. Flashy at times. But inconsistent as hell. Sai’vion Jones was the only real constant—40 tackles, 8 TFLs, 4.5 sacks, and enough pressures to make opposing QBs sweat. But he’s gone now. NFL-bound. And what’s left is a unit that might be elite… or might be a liability. There’s no middle ground in the SEC.

The injuries last year? Ugly. Jacobian Guillory’s Achilles gave out, Paris Shand was playing out of position, and the whole thing was duct-taped together by November. LSU’s D ranked bottom 5 in the SEC in most metrics. That ain’t just bad—that’s critical.

So Kelly hit the January portal like it owed him money. Pulled in Dominick McKinley—five-star beast. Got Ahmad Breaux ready to take that sophomore leap. Guillory’s back from injury. Shone Washington is adding grown-man weight in the middle. Patrick Payton came in from FSU, bringing that Rookie of the Year juice. And freshman Gabe Reliford? Might be in that rotation quick.

But in this game? ‘Pretty good’ doesn’t win nattys. If LSU wants to keep pace with Bama, Texas, and Georgia, they’re going to need more dogs in the kennel. Brian Kelly and LSU should be low-key looking for names like Braxton Fely, Beau Atkinson, and Kobe Stewart. Maybe even Bernard Gooden. They are all in the portal. They are all available. And any one of them could be the difference between “10-2” and “New Orleans in January.”

New threat for Garrett Nussmeier?

While all eyes have been on the trenches, there’s a little QB drama brewing in the back room. Garrett Nussmeier ain’t sweating just yet—but he might wanna keep a towel handy. Enter Michael Van Buren. Fresh out of Mississippi State, fresh off throwing 1,886 yards and 11 TDs, and now? Giving Nussmeier the ‘Don’t get too comfy’ vibes. Look, LSU grabbed Michael Van in the winter portal. Word around Bayou: The man’s making some noise.

And LSU ain’t done playing with the QB deck. They also flipped Ju’Juan Johnson from RB to QB like it was Madden Franchise Mode. With Colin Hurley recovering from that car crash, they needed bodies. Johnson, a Louisiana high school legend with over 14,000 total yards? Yeah, he ain’t just a warm body.

Offensive coordinator Joe Sloan has been hyped about Van Buren: “Michael did a lot of great things at Mississippi State last year,” LSU offensive coordinator Joe Sloan said. “I think Mike, when you watch when he gets comfortable — and you’ve really seen it, we’ve seen it a lot this spring — his comfortability in the pocket is exceptional… I mean, it is exceptional. And I think that’s a really huge talent for him, and then he can drive the football now. He can touch every piece of the field with his arm.”

Look, this isn’t a QB controversy… yet. But it is pressure. Nussmeier got new heat in the room. And if he starts slacking with his picks and turnover? This whole thing could shift by Week 3 or 5. You don’t bring in a guy like Van Buren to just hand out water bottles.

What LSU did this offseason was wild. They rebuilt like a startup with VC money. But in college football? That clock never stops ticking, and nobody’s going to call you greedy for stacking talents. Look, the portal closes soon. Moves gotta be made sooner. Brian Kelly better move quick, trying to dodge a warrant—quietly, and with backup plans on backup plans.