Sean O’Malley doesn’t talk much about fear. His public image has always been based on confidence, swagger, and the belief that he is THE man. Win or lose, he smiles, dyes his hair, and moves on. But, right ahead of UFC 324, the former bantamweight champion confessed something that still rattles him to this day.

For ‘Suga,’ the most distressing sound in his career isn’t a crowd or a referee’s call. It’s his phone ringing with a number he recognizes instantly. Years after his suspension, after regaining relevance and even winning UFC gold, anti-doping still puts his body in fight-or-flight mode. And that anxiety, he admits, never really left.

Sean O’Malley opens up on the night his career almost ended

On his YouTube channel, Sean O’Malley relived the exact moment everything flipped. He recalls picking up his phone, seeing Jeff Novitzky’s name, and responding without hesitation—until he heard the words “you tested positive for Ostarine.”

At the time, he had no idea what the substance was. All ‘Suga’ knew was that his stomach fell, and the story he thought he was living seemed to come to an end. What followed was neither public bravado nor Instagram confidence. It was a state of solitude. Sean O’Malley spoke about journaling during those months, trying to persuade himself that this wasn’t how his journey would end.

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But reality did not care about affirmations. He said, “It felt like it was ending. I would literally remember lying in bed, and there’s just nights where I would cry. Like, I just couldn’t believe it.” He further remembered lying in bed at night, crying, and sincerely believing he would never fight again if the tests came back positive for something he insisted he never did.

The damage wasn’t just professional but also psychological. Even after the suspension was reduced and subsequently attributed to contamination, the imprint remained. He said, “I’m out for two years at this point. Every single time I get tested by USADA, or whatever, whoever it is comes, I get this sense of anxiety and this panic every time I get tested.”

Years later, his idol Conor McGregor would dig up the skeletons and go after O’Malley in an unchecked social media rant. This caused a brief friction between the pair, but they patched things up later. But it proved how a positive PED test, even if it is in trace amounts from tainted supplements, can tarnish your legacy forever.

That is why this reveal is so important right now. Sean O’Malley isn’t sharing this from the bottom but from the main event spotlight. Ahead of UFC 324, with his legacy still very much intact, he admits that success didn’t erase the trauma he experienced. It simply taught him how to carry it quietly. However, it seems like controversies are just too attracted to the UFC superstar.

O’Malley clears the air on racism allegations after UFC 324 face-off

That lingering anxiety Sean O’Malley described provides vital context here. When you’ve already been through a career-threatening situation, each moment in the spotlight feels sharper. So, when his face-off with Song Yadong turned into backlash, he knew he had to address the situation before it snowballed further.

‘Suga’ stated the mask was just a foolish visual joke. However, once he noticed how it landed, he did not hide behind intent. He apologized during UFC 324 media day. “My intentions were never harmful,” O’Malley said. “It’s supposed to be a little silly joke. It was that, and it got taken out of [context]. I apologize if I offended anybody.”

Song Yadong didn’t fan the flames either. He made it clear that he didn’t want race brought into the sport, but he also wanted to move on and focus on the fight itself. That’s where this all leads anyway. For Sean O’Malley, UFC 324 is no longer about memes or mind games; it’s about proving that he can still control the chaos around him and fight his way back into title contention.