Caeleb Dressel gave voice to his mental health struggles before and after the Tokyo 2020 Olympics in a recent interview. Dressel sat down with Graham Bensinger in an in-depth interview, along with members of his family, and talked about his journey through these trying times.

Caeleb Dressel at Tokyo 2020

Caeleb Dressel is one of the most decorated athletes to come out of the Tokyo 2020 Olympics. He won gold in five disciplines: the 4×100-meter medley relay, 4×100-meter freestyle relay, 100-meter freestyle, 100-meter butterfly, and 50-meter freestyle. But the emotional high you would expect to come off this victory was lacking for Dressel. Despite this feat, Dressel claimed that he “didn’t hit any of my goal times in Tokyo.”

Dressel divulged in-depth the toll Tokyo took on his mental health. The months following the games left him feeling lost. So much so that even six months later, he found himself unable to shake the feeling off on Christmas.

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“I felt so lost. I wanted to get away from the water, but then that’s also one of my safe places. So it was, again, a rock and hard place. Yeah, it was a pretty miserable couple months,” Dressel said.

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Dissatisfied with his performance, the swimmer also reflected on his mindset regarding the same, “And that’s not fair to myself. That’s not fair at all,” he told Bensinger. “Like, I just won five gold medals on the biggest world stage in sports, and I’m thinking about how I wish I would’ve gone faster in certain events.”

Dressel’s experience with mental health

The swimmer had a history of depression and panic attacks, and the amount of pressure and expectations that Tokyo brought along only made it worse. In a segment of the interview, Dressel read aloud his swimming logbook that included honest reflections of his training sessions leading up to the 2021 Olympic Trials.

“F*** me. F*** my body. F*** swimming,” Dressel read. “Those are real words I was feeling in that moment,” he commented on his mental state at the time.

Since then, Dressel claims that his health has improved psychologically. Finding himself in better shape, he is competing in the U.S. swimming trials in Greensboro, North Carolina. He has already qualified for the World Championships by winning the 100-meter freestyle and even set a new US Open record with a time of 22.84 in the men’s 50-meter fly.

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