In a few months, the holiday season’s hues will be felt across every family. From Thanksgiving turkey to Christmas cookies, the arrival of joy and nostalgia is what marks the winter season for most people. But for this former LPGA player, those celebrations take a back seat as she faces the relentless reality of her daughter’s illness, which, by every passing second, seems to get worse.

Jane Park, in a moment of utmost vulnerability, took to her Instagram to share the news of her daughter Grace’s worsening seizures. “Seizures are bad right now. I’m trying my best to disassociate when she seizes…,” she shared.

In the next story, she wrote: “Everything has made me cry today…Knowing I can’t do shit for my kid to help stop her epilepsy makes me cry…The overwhelming love I have for G and the fact that it can’t help her makes me cry.”

For Park, these are everyday struggles. But at times, the weight of these becomes insurmountable to carry, leading to such breakdowns. Through these stories, the retired LPGA pro sheds the painful duality of her role – shielding herself from heartbreak while staying present for her child, the pain so much at times it forces her to look away.

“Don’t look away from her pain. Her pain is your pain. Don’t look away. But I do,” she admits honestly, unable to shrug off the feeling of being a “bad mom.”

The daily ritual, as explained by Park, involves timing the duration of the seizures. Her eyes are on the clock, while her hand is on Grace’s chest to make sure it’s still rising and falling. What is more haunting is the constant gasping of the poor 5-year-old as her body shakes. But the gasping means Grace is still breathing, getting oxygen, and that anchors Park to her duties firmly. “It’s a weird place to constantly be… We are losing, but we show up every day,” she says.

This month, Grace’s situation seemed to have gotten worse. Park, who often takes to her Instagram to share her daughter’s health update, just weeks ago shared another harrowing incident. Grace had a severe seizure at school, after which Park received the alarming call home. As she brought her daughter home, who had dozed off for hours by that point, Park shared the image on her account.

“Here we sit in the garage listening to @yelyahwilliams’ solo album (every song is) mixed with the low and steady snore of my 5-year-old in the back seat,” she wrote.

Since her birth, it was known that Grace would not have an easy life. She suffers from an intractable form of epilepsy, which means that medications have minimal effect on her. The seizure episodes, on the other hand, are unpredictable and often violent. Her fight has often put her in near-death situations, leaving both Park and her husband in a devastating state. And recently, the intensity of these seizures has increased manifold.

“It’s been scary to see her seizures change and develop as of late. They don’t happen as often, but man, they’re getting so dang strong and violent,” Park said recently.

But through all this exhaustion, the family keeps fighting and finding little moments of gratitude.

Grace celebrates a recent milestone against all odds

“She may only have five to ten years.” This is what Jane Park and her husband Pete Godfrey were told the moment Grace was born. A difficult path lay in front of the couple, but they decided to battle through. Five years later, the fight continues, but there is an added milestone that calls for celebration.

On 5th September, Grace celebrated her 5th birthday. An emotional Park took to Instagram to share her feelings, with a beautiful video of her daughter accompanying. “From the very first moment I held you in my arms, I knew you were special — but I never could have imagined the journey that lay ahead,” she wrote.

It all started back in 2021, when Park had missed the cut at the Volunteer of America Classic – her third consecutive early exit on the LPGA Tour. Professional disappointment surrounded her, but she had her 10-month-old Grace, comforting her.

But life had other plans, as within 24 hours, Grace suffered intense seizures and was rushed to the ICU. “I remember holding your tiny hand, begging you to stay, but telling you it’s okay to go—willing my strength into you as you lay there motionless, being kept alive by machines,” Park shared on her post.

Grace’s brain was swollen, and she was in a critical condition. Although she survived the attack, the lives of Park and Godfrey changed forever. “She will have a hard life,” the doctors told them.

Yet, Grace keeps defying all odds every single day. “Five years of proving doctors wrong. Five years of being the bravest, incredibly stubborn, wonderfully unhinged, and most beautiful soul I’ve ever known,” writes Park as a proud mother, who decided to give up her career in 2023, to become a full-time stay-at-home mom.

As the Park-Godfrey celebrates the 5th year of Grace’s brave fight, one can only hope for a better time.