Philip Rivers’ return to the NFL was always going to come with questions. He’s 44 years old, and it has been nearly 1,800 days since his last NFL game. And instead of a soft landing, Rivers was dropped straight into one of the league’s toughest road environments, as the Indianapolis Colts traveled to Seattle in Week 15. To his credit, it wasn’t a collapse.

Rivers kept the Colts competitive and had them within striking distance late. Still, the Seahawks did just enough to escape with an 18–16 win, leaving Indy with another close loss and plenty to unpack. That unpacking didn’t take long, as Cam Newton jumped right in. After the game, Newton offered his take, but not in the usual breakdown format. Instead, he delivered his critique through a mocking melody, blending humor with analysis while very clearly poking fun at Rivers’ long-awaited NFL return.

“Philip Rivers is not the answer for the Indianapolis Colts. Why? The play just wasn’t great,” Newton said bluntly before launching into the song. “It’s been a long, long time throwing, and I know, still there’s going to come. Oh yes, it will. Oh, yes, it will. There have been too many options. Being running low. But baby, looking at joy. Grabbed it; I see how. Grabbed it at will and the tile in our hall. Because I’m 44, and I got to get more.”

“Did five-yard check-downs, did half-back screens. Oh, the team going to know, because they going to get no easier. It’s going to get tough. Tough, tough, tough. Rough, rough, rough. Because, baby, I’m looking at my sketch. It’s going to have me jumping off the ledge. Because I see the San Francisco 49ers. They ain’t no h*e. But they’re the easiest ones, huh? (The co-host asks who’s next.) You didn’t know? Jacksonville Jaguars and Houston Texans,” Newton finished, breaking down the Colts’ upcoming games.

The song itself may have been playful, but the message behind it was serious. Newton wasn’t just joking. He was laying out why he believes Rivers, at this stage of his career, isn’t built for what’s coming next. The numbers back up a lot of what Newton was getting at. Rivers finished the game 18-of-27 for 120 yards, with one touchdown, one interception, and one sack. On paper, it looks fine. Dig a little deeper, and the concern becomes clearer.

Rivers struggled badly when asked to push the ball downfield. He went just 2-of-8 for 33 yards on throws of 10+ air yards, with the interception coming on one of those attempts. Meanwhile, he was highly efficient underneath. We’re talking 16-of-18 for 87 yards and a touchdown on throws under 10 yards. That split tells the story. Rivers could manage the short game, but anything beyond that became a challenge.

And context matters here. Rivers has been out of the league for five years. He had limited practice reps. And his first real test came against one of the strongest defenses in football, in a hostile environment. That’s not an easy assignment for anyone, let alone a 44-year-old quarterback trying to shake off rust. Still, this is exactly why Newton labeled him as limited.

Age narrows the margin for error. Arm strength fades. Timing becomes inconsistent. And conservative football only works if the schedule cooperates. According to Newton, that’s where the real problem begins. Following the loss, the Colts sit at 8–6, but the road ahead is brutal. Indy faces the San Francisco 49ers next, followed by the Jacksonville Jaguars and Houston Texans. Newton even joked that the 49ers might be the easier one of the group, but the final two weeks may not show mercy.

The Jaguars currently lead the AFC South, while the Texans are firmly in the wild-card hunt. There’s no breathing room. And Newton’s point was simple: if Rivers struggled to stretch the field in Seattle, it’s only going to get harder from here. For now, Colts head coach Shane Steichen has confirmed that Rivers will start against the 49ers in Week 16. What happens after that remains open-ended.

Can Rivers steady the offense enough to survive this stretch? Or will the limitations Newton highlighted become too hard to hide? That answer won’t come through a song. It’ll come over the next few weeks. The one thing, though, that is almost clear is that Cam Newton isn’t a big fan of the Colts’ signing Philip Rivers at this age.

Philip Rivers’ signing feels like a slap in the face to Cam Newton

The Colts were desperate to add depth in their quarterback room. The reasons, however, were understandable: Daniel Jones is out for the rest of the season after suffering an Achilles injury. On top of that, the backup quarterbacks are sidelined as well: Anthony Richardson since October and Riley Leonard due to a knee injury.

At that point, Indy was simply running out of options. Rivers’ signing felt less like a bold move and more like an inevitable one. But to Cam Newton, the decision landed very differently.

“It’s almost like a slap in my face, bro. I’m not even gonna lie,” Newton said on the recent episode of his 4th & 1 with Cam Newton Podcast, released on December 11.

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Newton spent 11 seasons in the NFL, all but one with the Carolina Panthers. While his last snap came back in 2021, he’s never officially announced his retirement. And when his co-host, Omari “Peggy” Collins, asked why Newton didn’t make himself available to the Colts, Newton’s response caught attention immediately.

“Did Philip Rivers send any type of signs that he was available?” he said, while adding that he’s “no sucker” and “no lab rat.”

But when Collins pointed out that Rivers previously played for the Colts in 2020, Newton didn’t back off. Instead, he doubled down: “I don’t give a damn if he was in their family! He’s 44 years old, bro! Do you see what I’m saying? How do people hold Cam Newton to a standard that you’re not holding everyone else?”

That frustration is hard to miss. Newton isn’t just upset about one roster decision. He’s calling out what he sees as a double standard. Why age, time away from the league, and recent play seem to matter differently depending on the quarterback. Still, while Newton is venting, Rivers is already back on an NFL field. And even though he couldn’t deliver a win in his return, the Colts clearly believe he can still give them something meaningful.

After all, the last time Rivers wore Indy’s uniform, he helped guide the team to the playoffs. Whether he can repeat that outcome this time around remains to be seen. But for now, the Colts are betting that familiarity and experience will be enough to keep their season alive.